Summer Activity Spotlight - Pine Springs - Week 7 (AKA John King Week).

NOTE:  Taylor St. actually attends 2 sessions of Pine Springs (one geared for younger kids and one geared for our older kids).  This post is about the latter.

Within two weeks of moving to Hobbs, NM in 2007 I was loaded in a church van with mapquest notes and a laptop computer running Microsoft Maps.  I had a small group of kids and much enthusiasm about my new ministry role.  Within a few hours of leaving Hobbs I had lost my wallet (I still have no clue where it ended up), Davon was puking on the side of the road and we were utterly and hopelessly lost without cell phone connectivity.  Miles of logging trails, cattle trails, and fallen trees later a Youth Minister, his wife, and four kids were kissing the ground of Pine Springs Summer Camp in the beautiful Sacramento Mountains.  Did I mention I was the Keynote speaker within minutes of stepping out of that van?

In spite of such an inauspicious beginning for myself, Pine Springs is deeply embedded in Taylor Street's history.  Our own D.A. Cochran is a very long time board member and countless Taylor St. Youth have attended Pine Springs.  They have sang around the campfire, been baptized, attended classes, and made countless memories.

Here are my Top 5 Reasons you Should Attend Pine Springs John King Week!

5)  No cell phones or internet.  You are disconnected from the world.  It is glorious!  Try it.

4)  The scenery.   Pine Springs sets in between two mountains.  Oh what you don't like that?  Let me take you to the waterfall or the crevice.

3)  The classes and Keynotes.  You attend Bible class twice per day and hear uplifting messages each evening.

2) Campfire and stories with Cliff.  Seriously.  It's a fire....  It's a fire at night.  We sing songs (some fun, some spiritual) and then Cliff tells stories.  It happens under the stars.  You've never seen so many stars!

1)  The singing.  I'm not a huge music guy, but the worship is humbling and inspiring.

Honorable Mention:  Canteen dance party.  No further comment.

What You Need to Know.

Location:
Pine Springs sets in the beautiful Sacramento Mountains near Weed, New Mexico in the Lincoln National Forest.

Date:
July 10th - 16th (on the schedule it is called Week 7, or Childress / Bell Avenue Week.  Historically it has been called John King week.).

Cost:
$275 (Scholarships are available for Taylor St. members following our established guidelines).

Spirituality:
Cabin devotionals, 2 daily Bible classes, evening keynotes and worship, and many many other opportunities to connect with God and others.

Age Range:
7th Grade through May graduates.  (Many of our 7th and 8th graders attend Week 10 - Oakridge Week).

How to Register:  Don't wait.  Last year some campers were turned away!
Click Here
                                                                                                                                                                                       

Summer Activity Spotlight - Gloreta Wilderness Hike

Every week I will be highlighting/reminiscing about one of our Taylor St. Church of Christ Youth activities.  This is to inform and inspire about these activities.  In the long run, I want you to choose to attend this summer.  Also, some of you can be reminded of where you have been and lessons you learned along the way.


I'm going to start this one off with one of my favorite summer activities - heading to higher elevations for the cooler weather and spending time outdoor in nature (o.k. I'll admit that this could be like 3 different things)...  I'm talking about the Glorieta Wilderness Hike!

Top 5 Reasons Glorieta Wilderness Trek is Spectacular

5) You never have to put the toilet seat down!  (OK that one is just for the guys and for the record Doug suggested this one).

4) You don't have to go outside to see the stars, trees, mountains, etc...  Because you are already there!

3) You will tone muscles you did not know you had.  Seriously!

2) Jesus and his disciples bonded while walking countless miles.   It's a chance for you to do the same with your friends.  Just full disclosure, you will all smell like a dirty gym sock stuffed into a drain pipe.  It won't matter to anyone.  All those sweaty kids bond anyway!

1) This is a chance to see, hear, feel, and experience God in a special way.  You are God's unique masterpiece while walking through a very special masterpiece also created by God.

OK...  Nuts and Bolts of what this trip actually is and when we go.

Location
Glorieta Camps is located in the Sangre de Cristo mountain range of the Southern Rockies in Northern New Mexico right off of Interstate 25.

Date
June 27th - July 1st

Cost
$150

Activities
We spend 4 days and 3 nights in the wilderness.  We hike and camp.  There are also excursions along the way such as repelling and exploring an abandoned mining town.  This is a time to bond and experience nature.

Spirituality
We have several daily devotions along the way.  The coolest part of the trip is "solo time" in which participants spend time alone in the wilderness with nothing but their Bibles and their journals outdoors in nature.  It's sublime!

Logistics and Equipment
Campers bring a few basic items (sleeping bags, clothes, etc...) Glorieta supplies a guide and most of the camping equipment and food.  Additionally Glorieta's flagship camp has many fun things to do that we typically participate in on the last day!

Who is this trip designed for?
All Youth Group Members that in the Fall of 2016 are in the 6th - 9th Grades.

How do I Sign Up?
Write down your name and email address on the proper sheet on Lance's office door.  Glorieta will email you the link for full registration.

Cultural Relevancy and Gussing up the Old Gal

This is not all I ultimately intend to say on this topic.  I will leave a great deal unstated.  I’ll likely sound harsh, traditional, and not very evangelistic.  In the name of brevity I’ll skip the moderating remarks that may absolve me of these charges and rely upon the reader’s good graces to not assign ill thoughts to me based upon the few words that follow.  So, here goes:

Evangelism is a salient topic.  The Christian Chronicle has aptly documented the decline in numbers within churches of Christ.  The Barna group has tracked similar trends for American Christianity at large (with some notable exceptions).  A few years ago I read Jim and Casper go to Church.  Recently, an acquaintance forwarded along an article via Facebook on the topic of these depressing numbers.    

In many discussions of evangelism, a similar tendency emerges.  Step 1:  Our numbers are low.  Step 2:  Identify cultural trends that are especially relevant to young people.  Step 3:  Point out the shortcomings in the church to meet those needs in the face of the aforementioned cultural trends.  Step 4:  Make a case for how addressing the social trend is actually consistent with scripture and ancient Christianity.  Step 5:  Encourage the church to adapt to address this need.  Step 6:  Wait for the pews to fill up. 

So, we hand wring.  We read.  We plan.  We discuss.  We make some changes.  We try.  We go to a conference.  We wait and…..  The pews rarely fill up.  I’m being over-simplistic, “mea culpa!”  But what if this unstated paradigm is wrong?  The paradigm that says the church is the bride of Christ, but sometimes we need to “gussy up” the old gal with lipstick and a new hairdo so as to allure unbelievers.  We go for a modern and stylish look.  Then once we get possible converts in our midst we have a quandary.  Are we free to wipe off the make-up and allow the radiance of natural beauty to pour forth?  Or are we obligated to add 6 inch stilettos and a chic black skirt to the ensemble so as to ward off boredom with Christ’s bride with our new friends? 

I’m of course being facetious.  I say this not to jar you, but myself.  I sometimes fall into this unconscious pattern of thinking that ascribes noble virtues to unbelievers.  I think if I can just get the church to be “relevant, non-judgmental, and non-hypocritical” then finally we would be worthy for all these people to enter through our doors and into our lives and fill our pews, lifegroups, and bible classes.  Subconsciously, we who are all too familiar with the church’s shortcomings admire those that have not yet joined.  Because after all, why join such a miserable lot like us?  “Hold out for something better!  I sure wish I had,” our thinking may go.  I nearly assign spiritual maturity to unbelievers for holding out for a “real church” that is free of the hang-ups that seem to plague all of us believers that joined before somebody figured out how to do church the “right way.”  Scripture does not ascribe such noble labels to unbelievers as my unconscious routinely supplies. 

The Pharisees believed in purifying Israel to bring about the arrival of the Messiah.  Today, sometimes we try to purify the church in order to bring about a flood of new converts.  Here is the pivotal question:  do we seek transformational change within the church to please God or please the culture and thus become more inviting to unbelievers?  Now that’s a false dichotomy.  I know.  But it gets us in right room of the house to ask the right questions. 

Our faith has always been two legs of a triangle:  Personal devotion to God and a communal devotion to one another.  A neglect of either is detrimental to the other.  In my humble opinion, living faithfully to God and in loving community with others is the most effective evangelistic strategy available to the church.  We can build websites, knock doors, use twitter, serve fair trade coffee, and build elaborate programs, but ultimately life is lived walking with God in community with others.  If we are unfaithful to the cross of Christ, then what have we accomplished in our cultural relevancy?  If in fear and insecurity we insulate ourselves from others, then we don’t really understand the gospel, even if we faithfully carry out the external traditions. 

I’m not concerned if Taylor St. is culturally relevant.  I’m concerned that Taylor St. is relevant to hurting people that want to follow Jesus and do so in a loving community full of sinners that rely on God's grace daily.  I know that our worship services will never match what the world has to offer in the way of entertainment, but I believe that strongholds are defeated and the heavens open up each moment we lift our hearts in song.  Kim Kardashian is culturally relevant so is social media, Lexus, Lady GaGa, Justin Beiber, the NFL, and LeBron James.  Build your church around those icons and see how relevant and faithful you remain over any stretch of time.  People come to Christ fleeing the world, not because they are so enamored of this world!  I don't want to hitch my spiritual wagon to any cultural icon, not even Tim Tebow, Kirk Cameron, or Duck Dynasty.

We may build better outreach tools.  But ultimately we are calling people into community with us.  No program, no schedule of time and place, just authentic community in living rooms, around tables, and on road trips.  There are programs that may fan this flame, but there is no substitute.  We seek to form two interconnected relationships:  1) God, 2) others, period. 

Here is what I really believe:  around those tables and in those living rooms, "social trends” are neutered.  They don’t matter near as much.  When I talk with people about their challenges at work or about their families and their spiritual struggles, it doesn’t matter what is trending on twitter or what is on the front page of the Drudge Report.  What matters is that two human beings are overcoming the brokenness of human relations experienced in the Garden.  Two human beings defiantly stick a thumb in Satan’s eye and risk the pain involved with all human intimacy.  What is more relevant than sticking it to Satan, drawing near to God, and nearer to one another? 

“Hit LIKE if you love God.  Repost on Twitter if you care about saving souls and forward to everyone in your address if you want to receive a special blessing from God!” 

I have to go get my “YOLO” tattoo and listen to Mumford and Son on repeat.  Follow me on Twitter!

P.S.

If you took the last two sentences seriously, go back and reread the piece.  You clearly didn’t understand it the first time. 

What do we Reward?

Upon leaving ministry the first time I was encouraged by a trusted well-schooled friend to pursue high levels of education because “it will change you.”  I’m still not entirely sure what it meant to the speaker, but well into a master’s program I can cite one major change in my way of thinking.  Speech-language pathology is what is known as an evidenced-based practice or EBP for short.  In a nut shell EBP demands that clinical decisions should be made in light of the best possible evidence.  The gold-standard of evidence is multiple randomized controlled trials from a published journal.  The lowest level of evidence is “expert opinion” (meaning it lacks research data) or clinical judgment.  I’ve over simplified EBP, but you probably get the idea.  Those three little letters written with a question mark in the margin in red ink on a clinical report can ruin your entire day.  Even worse, during a conference your supervisor may interrupt you with the simple question:  “what’s your EBP?” 

EBP has a grounding effect on thinking.  It is easy to become carried away in two directions:  1) doing what’s easy or 2) choosing a treatment that “sounds interesting.”  EBP limits both tendencies.  The clinician is neither rewarded for tradition nor innovation solely for tradition or innovation’s sake.  In principle, the clinician is rewarded for performance.  Oh, I forgot to mention.  Not only does EBP demand data in choosing treatment, but data is tracked on every session to determine the efficacy of treatment.  

I read plenty of ministry books and blogs.  I listen to a lot of sermons on iTunes.  Here is what I’ve noticed.  Ministers are rewarded (with our praise, attention, positive feedback etc…) for being interesting.  They are rewarded for agreeing with our pet philosophies.  Perversely, they are even rewarded for criticizing the church in some instances.  Probably because when we blame “the church” it relieves the individual of short comings.  But mostly, preachers are rewarded for eliciting our emotions.

I stand guilty.  I’ve told sad stories from the pulpit.  Tragic stories: stories difficult to repeat.  I think I was honoring God in making a larger point.  I’ve also used humor; stories from the past or refashioned jokes as ice-breakers.  Hopefully, it served a greater end, but I also enjoyed the rhetorical mileage along the way.  The best preacher/teacher I’ve ever encountered at incorporating illustrations with a larger message is Rick Atchley.  Granted, I don’t think Rick is fixing the office copier or making hospital rounds like the average non-mega church preacher, but the man uses illustrations effectively and not merely as filler or to emotionally manipulate his audience. 

Most ministers are highly educated.  Their opinions are respected near universally with everyone within their bubble.  Maybe long ago, in our restoration heritage we were in the habit of asking for “book-chapter-verse.”  But, even that system is rife with the corruption of proof-texting and manipulation.  Today, more missionally-minded brethren will use buzz words like “imagination” and “story” as modern day proof-texts when passing off opinion as scripture.

I don’t bring this up to “go after” anybody and I don’t for a second think that we need less interesting or less-emotional sermons (ok, some youth speakers are flat out manipulative and should use less emotion, including myself).  But, we need to label our ideas for what they are.  Opinions are just that, opinions.  Scripture is scripture and anecdotal experience is just that as well.  Sometime ago a blogger noted a “trend line” within churches.  I asked for the data points of said trend line.  I was told there aren’t any data points on the trend line.  Hmmmm, a practitioner of EBP pulls out their last hair while screaming, “am I on crazy pills?”    

I recently finished Heaven on Earth by Joshua Graves and Chris Seidman.  It’s a light read checking in at just over 100 pages.  These are two incredibly thoughtful men.  I was moved to tears during one of the early chapters (Joshua Graves can write).  In the end, I fear I missed something (I did read the book with Kip and Callie in the same room, so it could be reader inattention).  Maybe the book didn’t intend to be rhetorically rewarding in the first place.  But when I read the last chapter I felt like I may as well have read a Chicken Soup for the Soul book.  One chapter in particular was virtually all illustration and nearly zero substance (the one on blessed are the pure in heart).  After every book/blog/sermon I inventory what I added to my bag of knowledge/truth/wisdom/empathy/edification.  Maybe I’m jaded, but I seem to be adding fewer items of one sort and more and more of another sort.  Possibly I’m guilty of applying some heart/mind dualism that doesn’t exist in scripture.  It just seems that so much preaching/teaching consists of too much sizzle (emotional illustration/anecdote/opinion) and not enough steak (truth/facts/scripture, etc…).  Perhaps that is a poor analogy.  Let’s say good preaching/teaching is lemonade.  It requires the sweetness of sugar and the cutting strength of lemon.  In a prior time many may have erred more on the side of too much lemon.  In our time, I at least, feel sugar bloated. 

Ministry exclusively deals in non-quantifiable goods.  I appreciate that.  It’s difficult to measure the “efficacy of intervention.”  Jonah was disobedient and had a hard heart, but I’m unlikely to encounter anyone with more convert “notches on the belt” than Jonah.  So, I don’t advocate for ministry moving to a non-spiritualized clinical practice of pragmatics and statistics.  However, I do ask for more humility and discernment from all parties involved in cutting through saccharine emotion, tribal rhetoric, over generalized anecdotes, and favored ideologies.  We will all be better off for it and have both full and well-balanced bags. 

As Kip and Callie say after every book:  THE END

A Revolving Door In and Out of Ministry; But in a Good Way

I have a peculiar job.  I’m a paid professional youth minister.  Even now (after many years), saying it out loud feels unnatural.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love what I do.  I love TSCOC.  Most of all, I love my teens and their families.  But, I can never embrace the whole “youth minister” stereotype subculture.  I don’t play video games, make fart jokes, throw water balloons, or wear Rob Bell style spectacles.  OK, so I occasionally wisecrack about gestational gasses.  I have very few close friends within the profession and do not have a formal ministry education.

I never had a “career” youth minister as a teenager.  In high school we had men and women in the church that offered their time and attention.  They loved us and the really good ones challenged us and spoke to us like maturing Christians, not immature children.  I’ve never bought into the trope that I have to act like a teenager to relate to a teenager.  Because even when I was a teenager, I was atypical, so trying to act like a “typical” teenager in my 30’s would be insincere at best and cringe inducingly awkward at worse.

Some time ago I was proffered for my advice to an aspiring youth minister at LCU for an assignment.  I won’t reconstruct the advice in its entirety, but I will give you a brief outline of the advice I would give a YFM student. 

1)      Double Major (why spend 4 years of your life to get a degree with such limited employment opportunities at private school rates?  The world always needs engineers, programmers, teachers, and accountants.  In other words, learn to make tents a la the apostle Paul.

2)      Work your other (non-church) “tent-making” job first.  Jesus didn’t begin his public ministry until he was 30.  It’s not a rule, but it is a worthwhile principle to consider. 

3)      While you are “making tents,” volunteer to help at your local church.  Use your vacation time for youth trips, teach classes, etc…  Ease into the role of working with other ministers, parents, teenagers, and elders.  Learn to prepare a class series, back a trailer, and order pizza for a group; the really practical things you may not learn in the classroom.

4)      After 3-5 years of volunteering, maybe you have decided that you want to focus 100% of your professional attention on ministry.  Likely, you will be “drafted” by your congregation or some other congregation.  Either way, you are likely to have better options than a fresh grad sending out resumes to churches.

5)      Maintain your contacts and training as a “tent-maker.”  You never know when you may need them again.  I never want to be a 50 year old youth minister and I can’t preach a lick, so my clock is ticking as a professional youth minister.  However, I always want to be an asset to my local church, particularly the youth ministry. 

I don’t recommend full-time professional ministry for many people.  It’s harder than one may think.  John Knox, a wise mentor of mine, once made the comment, “If you can do anything else: do it.”  This wasn’t a statement of ability, but of passion.  I have known a small handful of people with the temperament and disposition for a full 40 year career in ministry.  These people are exceedingly rare.  It breaks my heart, but I am not one of them.  I can strongly recommend full-time ministry for a “season of life.”  There are far fewer people that I can foresee enjoying a healthy spiritual life after 40 years in full-time ministry.

If my observations are correct (that only a few ministers are built for the long haul), then this has many implications for the church.  Here are a few suggestions.

1)      Create a “tent-maker friendly” culture.  Sometimes staff can be territorial with their duties.  Be willing to consider dedicated tent-makers as “part and parcel” of your ministry other than when you need chairs moved or hot dogs served.  Have a culture that allows these individuals to sit in on staff meetings and have influence beyond that of less involved members.

2)      Be willing to hire less formally trained Christians that have an abundance of experience and ministry skills.  Today, we use academia to train ministry leaders.   The New Testament church used the local church and mentors as the training ground for up and coming young ministers.   As one with very little formal education in the area of ministry, I may be biased on this point.  I’m sure that I would have enhanced ministry skills by receiving a formal Christian education.  However, that lack of a completed formal education does not make me immediately less qualified to serve in my current position than every 22 year old-old clutching a freshly inked YFM degree from a Christian university.  At a summer camp this year of all the evening worship speakers, one had a ministry degree.  Every other speaker had formal training in other areas.  I found this to be both surprising and exciting. 

3)      Be willing to allow your ministers to gracefully exit out of full-time ministry.  As many likely are aware, I’m about one-third of the way through a master’s program that will eventually lead me out of full-time paid youth ministry.  We don’t intend to leave Hobbs or Taylor Street any time soon.  I attend classes very part time and do everything possible to not allow my future career to interfere with my present ministry.  More importantly, I look forward to the days when I can serve without any of the pressure that comes with being a “paid” employee.  I am very desirous of being a servant to another minister. 

In my dream world congregations would be populated with many ex-ministers or full-time ministers in training that are productively contributing to the work of the body.  Unfortunately, the stereotype of ex-ministers is that of being damaged, burned out, bitter, and angry.  Sadly, ministry careers almost always end badly and leave a once productive minister on the sidelines and a less-trusting and less-loving church in the wake.  Everyone loses. 

It’s nothing new to say this, but I have a strong desire to continue to erode the distinction between sacred and secular professions, both inside and outside the church walls.  I see it as an absolute economic anomaly that I actually get paid to do what I do.  My prayer is for a vibrant church culture with revolving doors in and out of full time ministry without the pain we typically associate with such career transitions.  Maybe, I’m naiveté.  Maybe I’m just projecting my personal ambitions onto the culture at large.  But, one way or another I’ll be an ex-minister someday (hopefully not too soon).  I intend to be a productive, happy, and encouraging church member.  We always need more of those.

The Chronic Divorcee

The chronic divorcee.  We probably picture about the same stereotype:  A middle aged, middle management schmuck with male pattern balding chasing coeds half his age at the hotel bar.  Or even more offensive to our overblown sense of decency:  the aging former runner-up beauty queen contestant with caked on makeup and dyed hair running through bank accounts and the collaterally damaged men attached to them.  Jesus has some pretty harsh words for those people in the Sermon on the Mount. 

“It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Our pulpit minister, Doug Crum, recently preached on this topic (It’s about the Heart).  As I share many of Doug’s thoughts on this issue, I wish to use his thoughts as both a foundation and springboard for my own thoughts in this blog. 

Jesus uses 6 antithetical statements in this section:  “It has been said..... (murder, adultery, divorce, oaths, hate your enemies) but I say….  .“  Here is what I notice in virtually all of these statements:  Jesus begins with a moral code either found in the Old Testament or as interpreted by the rabbinic code of the day (Doug’s sermon has some great illustrations of the teaching of the day during Jesus' time on divorce).  In the second leg of the antithetical statement, Jesus does not refute the general principle found in the first leg of the statement; rather he extends the principle to include our inner character as well as our actions.  These antithetical statements begin with an overt act that most, if not all, would agree are wrong.  We all know that we shouldn’t murder, commit adultery, etc…  Jesus extends this moral code to encompass our hearts.  However, in Jesus’ comments on divorce, he breaks with this pattern.  He begins with an overt act (divorce) and then seemingly elevates the seriousness of the sin.  In the previous pattern he does not elevate the seriousness of the sin, but the gravity of the concept as applied inwardly.  Jesus is Lord.  I do not refute his teachings.  But, what if “happily married” Christians viewed this teaching on divorce through the same template as the previous antithetical statements?  

Let me explain.  Anger in the heart is as morally repugnant to God as murder. That anger exacts harm in our souls and damages our spiritual lives.  How many Christians chronically divorce their spouses inwardly?  I have.  We may feel neglected or slighted, so we turn down the thermostat towards our beloved.  We may become less attached or less available in many ways and slights like so many frozen raindrops on a windshield obscuring our vision and sabotaging our purpose build up over time.  The most common form this may take is that of a wife becoming too emotionally involved with rearing children and other domestic tasks.  Husbands are more likely to become overly invested in careers and hobbies, that their spouse becomes just another obligation in their life.  The marriage relationship was meant to be the primary relationship within the home.  Even (especially?) Christians may over indulge their children and over pursue careers and even hobbies related to Christian events and activities at the expense of their marriage. 

The Old Testament forbids divorce and remarriage to the same spouse after the parties have been married to others (Deuteronomy 24:1-4).  A revolving door of marriage and remarriage opens up the door for all sorts of unintended consequences.  Men may pursue a “quickie” weekend divorce before a business trip to Las Vegas, only to “remarry” their wife upon the close of the business conference.  The wife may be enticed to tolerate such a situation in the name of survival.  The man may even feel morally superior for dotting the I’s and crossing the T’s on the divorce certificate.

As an inward reality, the aforementioned career chasing male or over involved mommy, may be just as guilty of only “checking back in” to the marriage when it is expedient.  Let’s be honest men may “check back in” for sex and women are more likely to “check back in” for emotional support.

I believe that an inward divorce is just as abhorrent to our God as an outward divorce (same relationship as murder to anger).  I’ve never committed murder, but I’m guilty of murdering others with my anger.  I’m on my first marriage, but I’ve been guilty of emotional separation at various times in the last decade plus years.  We may take this lightly, until we remember the true purpose of marriage:  to demonstrate the relationship between Christ and His church (Ephesians 5:21-33).  This adds a whole new seriousness to my unfaithfulness in my marriage.  Even the “except for marital unfaithfulness clause” in Matthew 5:33 takes on a whole new dimension when viewed through this prism.  As the bride of Christ, we have all been unfaithful, even if for only a brief season.  He may choose to divorce us, but Christ keeps purifying us and taking back his adulterous bride.  I have never formally divorced my Savior, but I have cut him off from my life at various times.    

Jamie is chained to me in the bonds of holy matrimony.  This commitment is intended to propel us to greater purpose, intimacy, and affection.  However, the terrible unintended consequence of this arrangement is aloofness, punitive behavior, or flat out neglect.  “After all,” one may think, “she’ll still be there when I really need her.” 

I think that all divorce is a tragedy.  The divorce that takes place at the courthouse is just as heartbreaking as the tiny countless divorces that take place in the space between two married Christian souls across a meaningless hearth in a no longer warm home.

Why I’m Not a Sports Fan

Anyone who knows me just fell over dead or called me a liar.  Let me explain.  The word “fan” is short for fanatic.  Fanatics strap bombs to themselves and blow up pizzerias and busses in the Middle East and elsewhere.  Fanatics have out of whack priorities, little self-awareness, and lack the ability for human companionship.  So no currently, I am not a sports fan.  But, let’s jump back into the “way-back machine.”  In the summer of 1991 I was 11 and a die-hard Atlanta Braves fan.  The previous year they finished in last place.  In 1991 my brother and I made our own tomahawks, hung Barry Bonds in effigy and chanted our way to the World Series where Kirby Puckett and a cheating low down good for nothing Kent Hrbek broke our hearts.  By the time 1995 rolled around and I was in high school, which means I could drive, liked girls, and started playing football; I barely watched the Braves defeat the Indians in the World Series. 

The only thing I liked more than the Braves was my beloved Cowboys:  Aikman, Novacek, Moose, Irvin, Emmitt, Jimmy, even Charles Haley and Deion Sanders.  I can talk to you for hours about Bill Bates the aging “gamer” and special teams standout from that era.  Along with everyone else in America I screamed at Leon Lett on Thanksgiving Day for ruining a picturesque win over the Dolphins.  I loved the Cowboys.  Then I went to college.  Aikman was forced into retirement, Quincy Carter was no heir apparent, and the Cowboys started losing.  Did I mention I was in college?  I quit being a fan.  I had more important things to do.

 

I went to Northwestern Oklahoma State University.  Haven’t heard of it?  Well, that’s ok you are not alone.  It’s an NAIA school in well Northwestern Oklahoma, Alva to be specific.  My freshmen year we missed the playoffs by a field goal in near blizzard conditions.  The following year we won the NAIA national championship.  I covered the team for the school paper as a writer and later as a columnist for a small website.  We had future NFL players on those teams and one of my best friends was the full back.  It was fun and I got paid (when the checks didn't bounce).  We blew people out and everyone cheered and got discounted gear at the bookstore based on how many touchdowns we scored.  I still have some of those t-shirts.  I was a fan.  The next year I got engaged at the National Championship game.  So, it is forever a part of my story.

Today, I’m a 33 year old full time youth minister, husband, father of toddlers, and graduate student.  I still keep up with both college and pro football.  I enjoy the MLB playoffs and even the NBA playoffs.  But, I’m no longer a fan.  Wins and losses do not affect my mood.  I don’t schedule my life around the season.  I watch when I’m not busy and I watch compelling match-ups regardless of who is playing.  Sure, I have my favorites, but I’m not blinded with love or loathing based on laundry and logos.  I NEVER use the terms "us" or "we" when talking about a team I'm not actually on.  Here is what I realized:  College football is 20 year old kids that play for a college that I didn’t go to.  Some of them are honorable good upright citizens and some of them are not.  We all like to think that our team is comprised of “good clean-cut Christian boys” that help little old ladies cross the street and that only the SEC and the Cincinnati Bengals have all the criminals and horse thieves, but that is rose tinted glasses thinking.   Here is what I do know:  No team bus is ever going to stop and help me on the side of the road.  They don’t know who I am.  They are not worthy of my passion. 

Most, but not all, “fans” that I know can’t tell me the defense their favorite team runs (half of you just now googled it).  They don’t know the difference between a 3-4 and 4-3 defense.  Many more never even played the sport.  They’ve never put on the pads, taken a read step, remembered blocking assignments or had those butterflies on the opening kickoff (I have a great story about my first high school kick off if you ever want to hear it).  You know by in large who are not crazy whack-a-doodle sports fans?  Ex- high level (college) players.  They love the game more than you do, know more than you and I know, and yet they don’t live and die with each win and loss of a team they are not a part of.  It’s called perspective.  They have it and “jersey wearing know-it-all fantasy football nerd” doesn’t have perspective.  Neither does 40 year old alumni tailgater chatting up undergrad coeds outside the stadium.  If you are over the age of 23 and you allow a game’s outcome to change your mood or ruin your weekend, then I perceive that as a lack of perspective on your part.  (Exceptions if you are directly associated with the team, as in your brother is the field goal kicker or your dad is the offensive coordinator).  Wins and losses don’t affect me once the post-game show begins.  I have a life. 

Let me flip the tables now.  I’ve heard minister colleagues complain that too many people would rather watch the Cowboys than attend their LifeGroup on Sunday afternoons.  Really?  Do you really think that you yammering at your flock another 40 minutes is the answer to anyone’s problems?  I doubt it.  Not always, but I prefer to watch the games with friends and family.  You know; in community!  We have traditions.  The twins wear Cowboy gear, Jamie makes special whole wheat Splenda Cowboy cookies and we fellowship with friends while the game is on.  The kids play and we all have fun.  Football provides the reason to get together, but doesn’t dictate our mood. 

Locally, football is a great cultural touchstone for relating to the community.  I attend virtually every home Hobbs game to support my students (band members, football players, cheerleaders, etc…) and to see folks from the community.  So to you ministers out there that are anti-football just treat your community as a missionary would treat their mission field.  Use what is available to relate to people where they are.  Paul did.  You wouldn’t go to South America and ridicule people for liking soccer (ok so I would, which is why I’m never going to be a missionary in South America).  So, show some respect.  Cheer on Friday nights and know enough about the Cowboys to have a 3 minute conversation with the townspeople.  Nobody expects you to get a blue and silver tattoo or diagram a Tampa 2 coverage defense. 

I think I have offended everyone.  So I apologize to one and all (except Fantasy Football nerds and soccer players).  “Ride Rangers Ride!”